


I Will Be Searching

by TheForgottenTurtle



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Star Wars Setting, Angst, Dark Leia Organa, F/M, Force-Sensitive Leia Organa, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-01-16
Packaged: 2018-09-17 23:11:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9350405
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheForgottenTurtle/pseuds/TheForgottenTurtle
Summary: After Han is frozen in carbonite and taken away by Boba Fett, Leia discovers there has always been more to her than she ever knew. Find out how Leia, Luke, Chewbacca, and Lando cope with the absence of their friend and how they plan to get him back where he belongs. *This is also posted on Fanfiction.net, by me.





	1. Chapter 1

Leia can't help but flinch as she not only sees, but also feels and hears Han's carbonite encased body thud to the floor. She buries her face into Chewie's hair, seeking comfort, but is completely dumbfounded once she finds that it doesn't change her current feelings whatsoever. Leia felt numb, but somehow she simultaneously is able to feel an intense and quite familiar pain. She is in shock.

Leia felt as if the voices speaking around her are in a language she was just beginning to learn, although she knows for certain they are speaking basic, her first and native language. She knows it is obvious that they are discussing the condition in which Han now is. But nothing that they said matters to her, Leia knows Han is alive and well, for the most part at least. She has always been able to do things like that, just know things for certain, sense things that others couldn't.

Leia knows she should, or could at least feel a little bit better that Han is alive, and there is a chance of getting him out of this mess, but she knows better. She is aware of how situations like this tend to work out. After all the things she has seen, it would be a wonder that Leia didn't feel this inevitable feeling of doom for Han that she does.

Leia hadn't yet had the chance to actually grasp the situation yet. She'd usually be coming up with a plan to fix what had happened by now, but her mind is clouded. She can't think straight. Leia had a feeling something would go terribly wrong when the Millennium Falcon first entered Bespin's atmosphere, but Han being frozen in carbonite had never even occurred to her, for force's sake she didn't even know freezing an organism in carbonite and them surviving could even happen. But really that's the catch, isn't it? If Leia knew every detail about every little bad that was bound to happen involving anyone she was close to, she'd prevent it with all she had. But now Han is being shipped off to Jabba the Hutt. Suddenly, Leia is finally coming to realization that she could at least attempt to save Han as a feeling of hope overcame the fear that controlled her mind before.

\------------------

"Princess, the odds of Captain Solo surviving-" C-3PO begins.

Leia groans and cuts C-3PO off,"3PO, I don't care about what you think the odds of Han surviving are. I know that Chewie and I will find him, I'm sure after Luke recovers he, and even Lando will help us. There's no doubt that we will find Han and when we do, he will be fine." Leia states, anger present in her voice. She stomps away, concealing how nervous she actually feels, was her statement actually true?


	2. Chapter 2

“Where else could he have gone? Tatooine isn't that far from Bespin, This whole situation seems a little strange to me.” Lando announces to their little group, he and Chewie went went straight to Tatooine after leaving Luke and Leia off with the rest rebellion. They haven't seen nor heard anything about Boba Fett during the past weeks they spent on the desert planet.

Leia shakes her head,”A little strange? I think it's very strange. What would Boba Fett want Han for other than to deliver him to Jabba?” 

“Maybe he's just having problems with his ship, or he knows we'd try and get on his tail as soon as we could. I don't think Boba Fett is stupid, he's gonna wait a while to actually deliver Han to Jabba, when he thinks that we give up.” Luke quickly reasons.

Leia nods,”possibly, that does make a lot of sense. I do believe your explanation can be true, Luke. There is only one detail I don’t agree with you on, If Boba Fett isn’t stupid, then why do you say that he thinks that we will eventually give up on Han?”

Luke shrugs,”He might not know what it feels like to care about someone.” 

Leia looks at the metal floor gloomily, I wonder what that would feel like, to not care about anyone, but myself… “We have to start planning how we’ll rescue Han, when he is on Tatooine. We need to be as well prepared as we possibly can. How much do you guys know about Jabba’s Palace?” Leia’s confident demeanor returns as quickly as it left.

”I've been there too many times to count, what do you want to know?” Chewie grumbles.

“Everything.” Leia answers plainly.

\----

White gases and unshed tears obscure my vision. Vader's constant mechanical breathing is enough to make me feel sick, but that jarring thud…

Leia swiftly sits up. Her lip quivers slightly as she sinks her face into her hands. She rocks slightly, in attempt to ward of the tears that she knows will come anyway. She hates crying, it made her feel so powerless, which is something that she definitely is not. But when you have nightmares of people you love suffering, it was hard to hold your emotions in, especially when the nightmares are just repeats of events that had actually occurred.

Oh Han, how is it that you can affect me like this? Leia silently thought. Suddenly a feeling of panic and emptiness washes over her. She feels like she is suffocating, her hands claw at her neck, in attempt to remove whatever is restricting her breathing. Several moments pass before Leia begins to realize nothing was ever there, she was always breathing and still continues to, but the feeling is still there. She sits breathing heavily, staring into the darkness, trying to remember where she is. 

Her breathing began to slow. The strange feelings had almost completely diminished. I'm fine. I'm fine. I was just sleeping. We had been trying to figure out how to rescue Han for hours, and we hardly made any progress, oh force! Han I'm so sorry! Leia frantically begins to break down. She sobs uncontrollably, for minutes or hours, she is unable to tell.

\---

“Leia, are you okay?” genuine concern is visible in Luke’s eyes.

She nodded,”Yes, I’m fine Luke. Aren’t we all really stressed out right now?” 

Luke nods as he takes a bite out of his breakfast,”Yeah, but I assumed that you might’ve been affected a little more than the rest of us.”

Leia throws him a questioning glance,”And why is that?”

He shrugs,”Well Chewie told me you and Han’s… relationship has changed, a lot too. I also kind of felt something last night.” 

Leia cannot control the slight blush that tinges her cheeks, or the sorrow that crushes her heart when Luke mentions Han. Luke’s words confused her though,”What do you mean, that you felt something last night?”

“Well,” He began slowly,”It was something, or more specifically someone, I felt them through the force. I’m almost completely certain you felt it too.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed, reviews and constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated!


	3. Chapter 3

Leia shakes her head,”Luke, are implying that I have the force?”

“Yes, Leia,” Luke's expression is serious,”I can sense it when people are force sensitive. I was never able to understand the feeling before I went to Dagobah, where I met Jedi master Yoda. He taught me how to understand that feeling, Leia I felt it coming from you last night.”

“Can you feel it now?” Leia asks.

“No.”

“Well then I don't have the force, Luke. You must have felt it coming from elsewhere.”

“No, Leia you have to listen to me. Someone blocked anyone from feeling your force sensitivity. I don't know who did it or how they did it, you could be doing it yourself for all I know.”

Leia's lips curled in as she looked down at her lap.

“Leia, you called to Han with the force last night,” Luke said softly,”I sensed your fear and confusion, and decided to investigate. I felt Han's suffering, I know you did too. I heard you calling to him, with the force. Just like I did to you on Bespin, and you saved me.”

“That was Han?” Leia looks back up at Luke, horrified.

Yes Leia hears Luke say, but his mouth remains still. She stares at him, her eyes wide. You can do it too, try, Luke urges.

Leia sighs as she reluctantly closes her eyes in concentration as she indifferently attempts to respond to Luke, Is it working? She opens her eyes, Luke's proud smirk is enough to tell her that to him, her response was audible. Leia frowns, and she could swear her heart skipped a beat right at that moment. This can’t be possible, of all people how can she have the force?

“Leia, this is bizarre, I had at least some training before I could call to others, but you, you were able to respond so quickly. You should come back to Dagobah with me, so Yoda can train you too.” Luke suggests in utter awe.

“No Luke, my first priority is to rescue Han. I think that it should be your's too.” Leia quickly retorts, her breathing picking up.

“Oh no, of course it is. I mean after we rescue Han, of course.”

“I'm sorry Luke, I'm going to have to decline,” her voice squeaks slightly,”I don't want to be a jedi, and I doubt I even have enough force or whatever to be one.”

“You don't have to become a jedi, it just might be nice to understand the force. And of course your force sensitivity is strong enough.”

“I'm sorry Luke, I don't want anything to do with the force.” Leia stands up,”I have a briefing to attend, I will see you tonight. Make sure Chewie and Lando know we're coming at 1900.” Leia turns away from Luke, only to quickly turn around again.

“Oh, and Luke, please don't tell anyone about… what we just spoke of.” Her warm eyes filled with uncharacteristically, poorly masked anxiety.

“Don't worry, Leia, I wasn't planning on it.” Luke gives her a weak, yet reassuring smile.

She attempts to return a smile, but still looks sad,”Thank you Luke.” With that she turns around, and heads towards the closest exit of the mess hall. The only way Luke is able to pick out Leia from the rest of the hungry Rebels is her regal stride and short stature.

\-------

Leia enters her nearly closet sized personal quarters. She falls onto her cot and stares at the metal ceiling, her breath picking up rapidly. Leia doesn't have a briefing, or at least not for a few hours. She just needs some alone time.

Leia stares blankly at the ceiling. Her body trembles slightly. She can't believe she has the force. She can't believe that she hadn't found out earlier. Now that Leia thought of it, it made so much sense, her weird feelings, and instincts.

She possesses the same mystical power as Luke. She possesses the same dark power as Darth Vader. Leia’s eyes quickly scan the room, as if searching for something; something that wasn’t there. Leia's mind quickly comes back to Darth Vader… A sad excuse of a living thing, one that has less morals than a simple droid.

Leia has seen and even experienced the disturbing, unspeakable acts Darth Vader has fulfilled using the force. I have the ability to do what Darth Vader does… Leia made sure that no one, especially Luke can hear her thoughts. Leia’s thoughts disgusted her, using her powers in the same manner as Darth Vader, against the innocent. But then, it dawned on her, She could use her powers against Darth Vader himself. These dark, malicious thoughts bounced throughout Leia’s mind relentlessly; she couldn’t help it, Leia needed to kill Darth Vader.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, I hope you enjoyed, and reviews and constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4

“If we want to know what's going on, we have to be on Tatooine. So, we have two choices, either we convince Mon Mothma to permit us to issue a Rebel mission to rescue Han, where we will have access to a decent amount of supplies, and everything will be able to be done far more efficiently. The second option is we leave and quit the Rebel Alliance, which of course will leave us with… really no guarantee of supplies and the chances of success significantly lower, but we can leave whenever we want.” Leia explains to Luke, Chewie and Lando, they sit crammed around the Dejarik table aboard the Millennium Falcon.

“Will it be difficult to convince Mon Mothma?” Lando asks.

“Of course, but we have to try,” Leia says.

Luke looks into Leia's eyes, evidently expressing concern, not for what they were currently planning, but for the matters they discussed this morning,”Why wouldn't Mothma want to help us, why does this even have to go through to her?”

Chewie growls in agreement with Luke.

“I don't really know, but her not thinking it's worth it to risk multiple Rebel lives, just to save one may be the reasoning,” Leia rolls her eyes,”I doubt she’ll be too enthusiastic about this whole ordeal especially since Han never officially joined us. But any missions must go through to Mon Mothma especially if they are extremely high risk, or the Rebels executing the mission are reporting from the main space station. Our mission most likely falls under both categories.”

“Do you think she’d be more willing to allow us to go if we had more people on our side? I mean, I can’t name anyone here that doesn’t like Han. I’m sure if I ask a few guys, they will be more than willing to help us, not only to convince her but also to help out during the mission.” Luke says.

Lando nods,”I think that's a great idea.”

“Yes,” Leia says quietly, her blank gaze adverts to Luke,”I think there are a few aspects about your suggestion that I noticed that could just cause everything to fall through.”

Everyone's eyes are on Leia, their gazes questioning, willing her to elaborate.

“Well, Mon Mothma can be quite unpredictable, especially when missions like these are brought to her.” Leia explains,”But I have gotten to know her tendencies fairly well. I know she won't like that there will be more valuable Rebels at risk, or that we will need more supplies for them. Mon Mothma is a very skilled politician, there's a reason why she is the leader of the Alliance. She can easily pick out any faults in a plan she doesn't deem necessary, so we have to expect her to shoot ours down with everything she has.”

“So, what are we gonna do?” Lando asks after a few seconds of silence.

“We have yet to even make our plan,” Leia states, evidently frustrated, she was beginning to break down,”We made no progress whatsoever, Han is to the best of our knowledge nowhere to be found, it's been nearly three weeks since we last saw him. And here we are, just sitting around talking nonsense. For Force's sake, I can't even think straight.”

Leia slumps down, and rests her chin in her hands, her elbows on the table. Chewie puts a comforting hand on Leia's shoulder,”Princess, we are not talking nonsense. We are all doing all we can to get Han back. We are trying to plan this rescue, but of course it's not easy, we don't know anything, you said it earlier, we have to be on Tatooine in order to.”

Leia grumbles in response.

“I think we all need a break, some time to think.” Lando says.

“No,” Leia sighs, her eyes are focused on the round, ivory and ebony table,”All we had was a break, we've been thinking for almost three weeks. I'm just… so frustrated.”

Leia looks up, everyone's eyes are on her. She inhales, and exhales. Leia thought of where the planning should start.

“We need to really think this plan through, it needs to be impeccable,”Leia begins,”We need to gain access to Jabba's Palace somehow.”

“Guards!” Chewie growls, exited.

Leia quickly realizes what he meant,”Yes, yesterday you said Jabba always has plenty of guards. We can have someone become a guard, somehow. That way, we'll always know what's going on in the palace.”

“I think I have an idea of how I can do that.” Lando offers.

“Okay,” Leia begins, her face radiant with hope,”I don't doubt it.”

\-----

Luke and Leia emerged from the Millennium Falcon,“I can't believe that we actually blocked out the whole mission today.” Leia's voice was slightly upbeat.

“Me neither, I really have a good feeling about this.” Luke says. Leia ignores the slight somber gleam in his eyes that she hadn't seen before.

Leia nodded,”Me too, I am convinced that Mon Mothma will allow us to put our plan into action.”

Luke nodded, with that a slightly awkwardly silence fell upon them as they walked back to their quarters. Leia knew Luke was dying to discuss her Force abilities; however, Leia also knew that Luke was aware that she didn't, and she was so thankful that he respected that and remained silent.

“Well, goodnight, Luke. Don't forget to ask a few guys If they're willing to help, make sure you tell them the plan, and that we will be presenting it to Mon Mothma tomorrow.” Leia breaks the silence at the point where their paths split.

“G'night, Leia,” Luke offers a feeble smile,”And you can count on me, I'll have the best pilots at breakfast with me tomorrow.”

Leia waits for Luke to begin walking straight forward, to his quarters before she turns to the left, making her way to her own.

\---

Leia exhales heavily as her door thuds to a close. She leans back again the thin metal panel, exhausted yet restless, nothing new to her. Leia softly slides to the floor.

Her mind is in shambles as Leia begins to call to Han. Don't let anyone else hear, be calm, those thoughts along with countless more race about Leia's mind. Han, Leia knows that her call is successful when she feels her throat constrict, just what she anticipated. Leia takes slow breaths, calming her, and unknowingly, she is also easing the fear and confusion that plagued Han. Han, I am going to save you, and prevent anything like this from happening again, Leia promised.

Leia just sits there, on the cold floor for a while, her mind was with Han, it calmed both of them. She wishes she could stay in this tranquility forever, but also wishes that Han were actually with her, in the flesh. Leia reluctantly ceases her unity with Han, she had other things she had to do, not necessarily better, but important if she wanted the promises she made to Han to carry out.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed! Reviews and constructive will be greatly appreciated!


End file.
